31 Dec 2011

Bonfire/Dancing Meditation

I've been trying this new technique for when I'm trying to meditate at night, and so far I've gotten positive results.
I imagine people dancing around a bonfire, with a few people playing music on the side. I start off by singing a folk song to the dancers, then I join in with the dancing which usually starts off in pairs spinning around the fire, before breaking off and dance alone - occasionally weaving arms as we go. After a while, I begin to physically feel movements which I see myself doing.

The first time I did this, I believe I heard Loki's real voice (it defiantly didn't feel connected to what I was visualizing in my head). But I can't remember what he said!
I then moved on, drawing the rune Gar in my head, and focused on Yggdrasil. Next thing I know is I'm being hauled upwards very quickly, my body was spinning as it went and I wanted to close my eyes and cover them with my hands.

Anyways, I decided to try again last night, to see if the dancing and singing somehow helps to hear Their voices better.
Here's how it went last night:


20 Dec 2011

The Rule of Loki: If there's no loop hole, he'll make one.

A year ago I saw a picture of someones tattoo, which was in dedication to Odin, and thought to myself: 'My type of dedication to Loki would probably be a red tee shirt with his name printed across the back.' The laugh I heard said he agreed with my choice.
Earlier this month he reminded me about that statement, so I went online and found tee shirts that were being made in America. After checking the price difference from dollars to pounds, I bought it and went to bed.

I woke up ten minutes later to 'it won't fiiiiit' in my head, and I couldn't rest until I checked for myself. The size chart said it would fit, and I went back to sleep...
'It's not going to fiiiiiit'
I checked again, and my chest had somehow grown four inches.  I was getting pretty stressed out over whether or not I'd order the right size, but gave up trying to measure myself- if it didn't fit then fuck it - and went back to bed.

Two days later, the email came in to say it was being dispatched. All seemed in order...then I saw this:
My Name
My Address
My Town
England
My postcode
...I happen to live in Scotland... even more stress. 
And so it continued for weeks, one little thing after another. I even said today at lunch 'It's probably fallen off the plane and into the ocean, or it's ended up in China. I really give up.' 

So you can imagine how happy I was when I opened my front door about an hour ago and there was the parcel in the middle of our door mat (the noise that came out of my mouth wasn't human).

So ta-da! Here it is, what all this trouble and stress has been about (my only complaint is despite it being the smallest size, it's still pretty baggy - ack well):


Update:
Loki's just reminded me of one of my unspoken rules: 
"Unless it has your name on it, DO NOT TOUCH" 
Seemed pretty solid at the time... fuck my life.

17 Dec 2011

I think my suspicions that it was probably Odin were maybe right.

Last night I tried again with similar results; thought of the runes Os and Ehwaz, pressure point on my forehead, etc.
But last night the pressure moved to my right eye and it felt like someone pressing the heel of their hand softly into my eye socket. I tried to opened my eyes, but my right one remained closed.

I'm not scared of Odin, but I'm wary of him being around when I can't feel Loki nearby (plus the fact I've been pretty cheeky to Odin in past dreams, so I can't help but feel he might have it out for me - disrespect of the All Father and all that jazz).
So I stated my Terms and Conditions, like the first time someone took over.
I honestly didn't believe at all  he'd even listen or take in any of it, but when I finished and said "Okay, on you go", my arm give a massive jolt... so I took that as a 'alright then' and stood back.

He didn't stay for long and his presence didn't feel very strong either - not like the first time I tried it. Maybe I've been trying too quickly and should wait a bit longer before going at it again.

16 Dec 2011

Fun with Runes!

Was practising 'letting them in' again last night; rather than writing the runes on my hand, I visualised the rune Os in my head. As soon as I had the shape traced in my mind, it felt like someone was pressing their finger really hard against my forehead (above the space between my eyebrows).
I thought to myself, "Well fuck, someone doesn't want me playing host."
I pulled back, deciding not to let my session go to waste, and focused on the runes Gar and Raido to help me travel. I only rose up a little bit before the finger on my forehead pushed me back down into myself.
"Okay, okay. I'll stop." And just rolled myself over to sulk to sleep. Still have no idea who it was that was pushing me back; though I suspect maybe Odin had a hand in it but don't have any proof yet.

This morning I was running extremely late for college due to buses being late ("Buses every 10 minutes" my ass!)
When I finally got onto one I realised that I wouldn't make the usual 25 minute journey (+ the 15mins to walk to the college) in the 20 minutes I had till class started.
Thinking "Oh I may as well, my luck can't get any worse right now," I visualised Raido and chanted 'swift travels' over and over in my head.
All the lights on the main road turned green one right after the other as our bus drove along, and it arrived in the town within five minutes.
Fuck yeah!

15 Dec 2011

Gods prancing around in meat suits

The other night I decided I was going to let Loki 'in' for a little bit; I've heard about the risks and side effects, especially if you've never done it before, but curiosity simply got the better of me (and Loki seemed rather eager once I hinted at it).
So I got myself ready and he gave the clue to use runes to help move things long.

I found that rather then visualising or drawing runes in the air, I can connect to them better when I write them onto my skin - so I spent some time drawing a cocktail of different runes onto the back of my hand (some to help me 'let him in', some to help me retain some control, and the rest to help me travel and ground myself back into my body easily).

I don't know if runes are essential in letting your gods prance about in your meat suit, but Loki wanted me to use the runes to give me a bit more strength in those crucial areas; especially if something was to go wrong and I needed to jump back in pronto.

Normally it takes me a bit of relaxing and breathing before I even get the buzz that tells me something's happening, but this time as soon as I laid back I was off.

As a kid, I used to do this thing where I could trick my body and mind into thinking my bed was floating and rocking back and forth; I could even feel the motion of it moving. That feeling is kind of what it felt like when I laid down; a feeling of moving up and about while I could still feel my body lying on my bed

In my head I starting listing a few rules (not that Loki would really listen to them, but hopefully ones that he'd keep in mind). Things like: not to cause myself bodily harm while he's got free rein of my body, not to hurt family/friends/pets, to try and resist messing with our personal/valuable items...or if he couldn't resist, to not break them, etc.

Once I did all that, I stepped back and let him have at it.

There was an immediate pressure on my forehead, like someone pressing a hand to it. Then my neck started twinging, giving the notion of wanting to move my head backwards.
I got the sense that it'd relieve the pressure on my forehead if I let him move my head back, so I opened up a bit more and allowed him to do so...very slowly. That kind of made me freak out for a few minutes while he did that, as I could not physically stop my head or body from moving once I gave him the green light. I really couldn't move or influence my body at all.

It got to the point where Loki couldn't move my head any further back, and my torso was trying to sit upright...which was giving him trouble as I was in a lying down position with my arms pinned by my sides, but damn was Loki trying to sit me up anyways. Finally he gave a small lurch upwards, and I instantly managed to take over. I called for a time out and Loki happily stepped out fully.

12 Dec 2011

Dear Loki,

You know that tee shirt I really like wearing?

The really comfy one?
It's the one of my family-friend's band?
That he gave to me at one of their gigs?

Yes, the black and white one with the logo on the front. Right..... care to explain why it's now black and navy blue?

No? Thought so.